Your Host: Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler
Live from The Phillips Arena in Atlanta, GA
Sunday Night HeAT short recap
-Nothing really but a buncha shit hype seriously! I was expecting at least Tajiri Vs Chavo Guerrero, something. But instead we were treated to Kurt Angle talking about how no one respects him even if he won a gold medal in Atlanta. Anyway, Angle also stated that the fans chanting "What?" is something idiots do. I agree. It's also rude, idiotic, and moronic. However, it doesn't bother Angle. Angle's habit is being a winner, not a loser like the people of Atlanta. He talks about winning the gold medal and numerous WWF titles and says he'll win the rumble. He wants the fans to chant something new like "Hero." Lawler is the only one to chant here. Angle says "Inspiration," "Dominant," and "Main Event At Wrestlemania." Fans say start he "What?" chant again, Angle says they marry there cousins in Atlanta but I disagree that's more of an Arkansas thing. He calls them ungrateful hicks also. Kurt leaves, Lawler defends him and says that Angle will win. My money was on Triple H all night but we knew that was going to happen.
-Mean while 15 minutes into the PPV I still haven't gotten the signal. Grrr. I missed the complete Dudley Vs Tazz/Spike match. Fuck you Cox Cable, and fuck you InDemand. However, I got the replay so I did see the match.
WWF Tag Team Championship
Tazz & Spike (c) Vs The Dudley Boys w/ Stacy Keibler
Dudleys make there way to the ring with the lovely Stacy. Tazz and Spike come out with new Cypress Hill music. Not like I care much. So many other better bands to make themes. Buncha ECW style brawling. The Dudley boys hit the backdrop neckbreaker combo on the outside floor on Tazz. Dudleys hit LSD with the same move only inside the ring. Bubba and Spike start the match now. Bubba rips off the neck brace and hits a shoulder neckbreaker. Bubba suplexes spike and tags out. D-von hits a snapmare and then the Hennig necksnap. Tazz meanwhile makes it back up on the ring. Bubba gets the tag and goes for a suplex but its reversed and Spike hits the Acid Drop. I refuse to call it the Dudley Dog. The Dudleys double team Spike with a double team flapjack. D-von made the tag earlier, and attempts his diving headbutt on Spike but he avoids it. Bubba and D-von go for a double clothesline on Spike but they hit each other. Tag into Tazz, Tazz dominates the Dudleys complete with a T-bone tazzplex, head and arm tazzplex, then another T-bone tazzplex, and a variation on a northern lights tazzplex. That fucking rocked. But only gets a 2 count. Spike hits a high crossbody on Bubba, then hits another Acid Drop on him. Stacy goes on the ring apron and Tazz hits the TAZZMISSION ON HER!!!! DAMN YOU TAZZ! D-von saves her. Acid Drop attempt on D-von, D-von tosses Spike out the ring, Tazzmission on D-von for the win. Hmm, pretty good. I was expecting an ECW brawl that would put me to sleep. **
-Edge says he's going to burn the devil or something. Edge is retarded, why can't he go back to the evil tortured soul Edge?
WWF Intercontinental Championship
William Regal Vs Edge (c)
Regal makes his way to the ring, so does Edge with Rob Zombie music. Edge is going to end up on Metal as we speak now. Nick Patrick checks Regal for the brass knuckles and gets busted. Edge clotheslines the hell out of Regal, hits a back body drop then stomps on Regal like crazy. Edge slams Regal's face right into the mat. Regal then hits a knee to Edge's head. Uppercut by Regal reversed into a Backslide by Edge. Regal locks on some sort of chinlock. Edge hits a leg lariat to the back of the head. Regal hits this sweet ass German suplex variation. Only gets a 2. Regal then hits a knee to the face again only getting a 2. Regal hits double underhook, Edge counters with a strange pin move like of like "Muken" in WWF No Mercy for N64. Regal holds on and hits a double underhook powerbomb. Regal clotheslines Edge out the ring. Regal goes for the tiger driver off the ring apron but Edge counters and DDTs him onto it. That was fucking sick. Only gets a 2 count after Regal puts his foot on the rope. Both men hit heads as the run towards each other. That sounded painful. Forearms by Edge then a shoulder block. Edge hits a vertical suplex only getting a 2. Regal hits that German waist lock suplex like move once again. Edge rolls on Regal and gets a 2. Edge goes for The Edgecution but its countered to the Regal Stretch. Edge makes it to the ropes and hits a sloppy ass version of the Regal Stretch. Regal then makes it to the ropes. Dropkick to the back and school boy by Edge only gets a 2. Edge goes up to the top and hits a spinning wheel kick. Edge spears both Nick Patrick and Regal. Regal grabs the BRASS KNUCKS~! Regal hits his devastating punch on Edge and pins for the IC title. Clash of styles all over. Not like it was bad or anything but the lack of build up killed it for me. **
-Regal talks about the power of the punch being a gift from God. That was great.
WWF "Why see Tajiri Vs Kidman for the Cruiserweight title?" Woman's Championship
Special Ref: Jacqueline
Jazz Vs Trish Stratus (c)
Jazz hails from New Orleans? I never knew that. Jazz comes out with absolutely no reaction. Trish comes out with a huge pop. Lawler bugs the crap out of me with his hormones. Jazz pounds the hell on Trish. Punches by Jazz on Trish, Irish whip then a back body drop by Jazz. Jazz hits a splash on Trish. Trish fights back with some punches then hits a sunset flip and a bunch of counters take place. Pretty impressive for a WWF Woman's match. Jazz kicks out the final pin and clotheslines Trish. Jazz hits a leg drop only for a 2. Jazz punches Trish right in the face. Jazz goes after the arm a bit. Jazz and Jacky get in a disagreement. Trish attempts a school girl, Jazz counters and pins only to get a really slow 2 count. Jazz counters a front face lock and hits an arm wringer. Trish hits her springboard bulldog only to get a 2. Jazz hits a kick to the midsection and then a DDT for a 2. Clothesline in the corner by Jazz. Jazz runs towards the corner again but Trish counters with a little boot and hits her bulldog for the 3. All right WWF woman's match. Say *3/4?
-Meanwhile, Reid "I beat Bischoff's ass" Flair and Megan Flair and Ric Flair all show up in the arena earlier in the day. Clips of the Flair/McMahon saga. Flair is the man.
Ric Flair Vs Vince McMahon
Flair comes out in his Speedo and blue robe. I was praying during the entire intro that Flair was wearing a shirt like he did with his last WCW Nitro match with Sting. But unfortunately that didn't happen, however Flair was in better shape even if he still had saggy man breast. McMahon is huge. Veins popping out are sick. Strange that Vince and Flair are both former WWF World Champions and have both been Royal Rumble winners. Huge stare down starts it. They circle around each other, Vince shoves Flair. Flair over sells like crazy. McMahon posses like he was Hogan. Vince nails a headlock. Flair throws him off and Vince hits a shoulder block. Another Hogan like pose then McMahon struts. Flair starts stomping on McMahon in the corner. McMahon tosses flair in the corner and hits a shoulder block then knocks Flair down with a reverse elbow. McMahon then starts chopping flair. Flair gets pissed and chops the hell out of McMahon. Flair struts, McMahon does the Flair Eye poke on flair. Flair falls face first and I mark out like a bitch. Vince then hits the shoulder thrust. Vince whips Flair into the corner, Flair screws up the Flair flip. Both are outside the ring. Vince grabs a sign and levels Flair with it. Flair is busted open. Vince throws flair into the barricades. Vince gets a trash can and beats Flair with it. Gr., I hate how Vince enjoys putting himself over like this. McMahon punches the hell out of Flair's head. Amazingly, Flair's a trooper. Flair gets tossed into the steel ring steps and basically tries to Flair flip them. Vince being the heel he is takes Flair's kids camera and takes a picture of Flair. McMahon and Flair go back in the ring. Vince works Flair's knee like crazy. Wow, this match is going no where. Vince continues to kill Flair's leg. Vince locks on the Figure Four Leg Lock. McMahon gets a couple of 2 counts with it. Flair counters the figure four. McMahon bails out the ring and grabs the led pipe. Flair low blows Vince. Flair chops the hell out of Vince. He delivers a punch and Vince falls down. More chop by Flair and he continues to beat the hell out of McMahon. Flair takes apart the Spanish announce table and hits Vince with the TV monitor. Flair looks at himself on TV. Flair hits more chops and the fans are going wild. Flair hits his nuggy punch combo to the head. Vince goes back into the ring. McMahon starts to beg off. Flair pulls him back outside. Flair bites McMahon in the head in front of his children and his kids take pictures! They return to the ring and McMahon begs off. More nuggy punches by Flair. Whoooo. Kick to the nuts by Flair on McMahon. Flair hits McMahon with the led pipe and locks on the figure four for the win. Wait a damn minute, that move worked? McMahon TAPS TO THE FIGURE FOUR! A bit disappointing but a fun match nonetheless. I wish most of the offense wasn't done by Vince but it was more of a back and forth thing. ***
-Nick Patrick is interviewed only to be interrupted by Stephanie. I remember why I hate her now. She's a McMahon. What use does she have for being on my TV? Austin creeps behind Austin says "What?" a lot and Stephanie runs away. Heh.
WWF Undisputed Championship
The Rock Vs Chris Jericho (c)
Rock makes his way to the ring. Jericho, my role model, my icon, my savior and Paragon of virtue makes his way to the ring with both titles in his arms. Jericho isn't the transitional champion, that's Spike and Tazz. Last year, Jericho won the IC title in a ladder match at the Rumble. In an event I was at. Jericho mocks Rock with the just bring it thing. Rock hits a clothesline then Samoan drop. Jericho gets Irish whipped and Jericho bails out the ring. Rock starts chasing Jericho around the ring. Both return to the ring Rock hits a GORE and then punches the hell out of Jericho. Jericho hits his flying forearm Rock slams Jericho head into the mat. Jericho hotshots the Rock right into the ropes. Jericho stomps on the Rock then chops him. Jericho sucks chant starts. Jericho nails Rock with a spinning wheel kick then a suplex. Jericho removes the turnbuckle padding. Rock uses his millions of punches. Walls of Jericho attempt by Y2J but Rock tosses him off. Jericho goes to the top and hits Rock with a missile dropkick but only gets a 2. Jericho hits a chinlock. Jericho keeps it on for a while Rock magically pops up and gets his energy back. He escapes the hold. Rock punches Jericho a lot again. Jericho goes back to the top rope, Rock hits the ropes and Jericho falls. Rock slaps Jericho's chest while perched on the turnbuckle. Rock hits a superplex on Jericho. Rock and Jericho having a punching competition. Rock hits his belly to belly "throw" it sure wasn't a suplex. Jericho hits a bulldog then Lionsault and then another one! Rock magically kicks out. Jericho goes up top and jumps, Rock catches him and locks on his sloppy sharpshooter. Christian and Lance Storm the ring. Storm distracts the ref Christian goes for a belt shot. Rock takes out both Storm and Christian. Rock Bottom on The Rock by Jericho only gets a 2. Jericho hits a senton, then attempts The People's Elbow but Rocky pops up like a luchadore. He hurls Jericho out the ring. He smashes Y2J's face on the steps. Rock becomes the second person tonight to break apart the announce tables. Jericho hotshots Rock onto the Spanish announce table. They go on the announce table. Jericho tries to hit the Rock Bottom but its countered into the Rock Bottom with the Rock leaping from the Spanish table to JR's table and the rings table. That was awesome looking. What's even funnier is to see Howard Finkle running away like a little bastard. Meanwhile, Rock tosses Jericho back into the ring and he gets a 2. Rock attempts the Rock Bottom but is countered into the Walls Of Jericho, which ends up becoming a Boston crab. Rock hits the ropes. Jericho goes for the WOJ again but countered with a small package. Rocky hits Jericho's flying forearm on the ref. Jericho uses a belt shot as the ref's down. Nick Patrick comes out! YAY! Rock kicks out somehow. Patrick and Jericho argue a bit. Rock hits a DDT. Patrick refuses to count. That's why I love him. Rock Bottom on Patrick. Spinebuster, People's Elbow you know the drill. But the ref is down so he doesn't win. Rock wakes up Earl, Jericho hits a low blow and rams the Rock's head to the exposed turnbuckle and pins the Rock with his feet in the ropes for leverage. **** good match.
-Shawn Micheals at WWF New York enjoyed the Flair/McMahon match and says his picks are Undertaker and Austin because they are from Texas. If you want to go by that logic so is Bradshaw.
Royal Rumble Match
Rikishi (1) and Goldust (2) start. Goldust goes for a sunset flip but doesn't work. Goldust punches Rikishi. Rikishi tosses him out the ring, but his feet don't touch the floor. Brawling between Goldust and Rikishi. Backdrop over the ropes, Goldust grabs the ropes. Goldust basically stands on the apron and gets back in the ring. Bossman (3) comes out. Goldust is perched on the top turnbuckle. Rikishi tries eliminating Bossman. Bossman takes Rikishi down with a clothesline. Goldust and Bossman double team Rikishi. Both men try to be Rikishi out of the ring. Goldust nails the Bossman. Bradshaw (4) runs to the ring. Bradshaw bunches the hell out of everyone and hits a back elbow on Bossman. Bradshaw hits a running shoulder block on Goldust. Rikishi hits a running hip attack on Bossman then the Stink face. Bradshaw tries eliminating Goldust. Rikishi superkicked Bossman over the top rope. Samoan drop on Bradshaw by Rikishi. Goldust pummels on Bradshaw in the corner and Bradshaw counters with a Powerbomb. Lance Storm (5) runs down to the ring and takes out Goldust with a clothesline. Goldust slingshots Storm onto the top turnbuckle. Rikishi tries to element Bradshaw. Storm tries getting rid of Goldust. Rikishi goes to help Storm but nothing happens. Al Snow (6) makes his way to the ring. Al starts brawling with Rikishi. Bradshaw clotheslines from Hells Storm. Al Snow tries to eliminate Rikishi. Goldust attempts to eliminate Al Snow. Snow gets back in and clotheslines snow. Rikishi tries tossing Storm over. Bradshaw gets punched by Al Snow. Billy (7) comes in and punches Bradshaw. Bradshaw hits him with a big boot. Goldust tries eliminating Rikishi. Snow and Storm fight on the ring apron trying to eliminate each other. Storm gets eliminated via a superkick. Rikishi tries getting rid of Al Snow. Bradshaw is pushed over the top by Billy. The Undertaker (8) rides down to the ring. He looks angry. All 3 guys in the ring work on Goldust. Chokeslam on Billy. Undertaker cleans house. Undertaker chokeslams Goldust over the top rope. Taker tosses Al Snow over to top rope and clotheslines Rikishi over the rope and hurls Billy out the ring. Matt Hardy (9) with Lita runs down. Taker gets punched. Taker goes for a chokeslam. Lita comes in and tries a hurricanrana. Lita low blows Taker. Matt hits a swinging neckbreaker. They continue to stomp on Undertaker. Matt tries eliminating UT. Matt starts punching UT like crazy. Matt attempts to eliminate UT. UT starts making a come back. Jeff Hardy (10) comes to the ring as Matt's being suplexed. The Hardy Boys and Lita all stomp the hell out of the Undertaker. Matt and Jeff hug. Undertaker clotheslines Matt and Jeff. Jeff and Matt hit the Swanton Bomb/Twist of Fate combo on Undertaker. Both try to toss Undertaker over. Poetry in Motion attempt allows Taker to eliminate Jeff. UT hits the Last Ride on Matt Hardy. Matt is flung over the top rope. Maven (11) runs down and receives a big boot. Lita distracts UT, the Hardys jump Undertaker and stomp on him. Maven dropkicks Undertaker over the top rope!! Undertaker stands outside the ring looking pissed. Undertaker returns back to the ring and looks at Maven. Undertaker continues to punch Maven like crazy and tosses him threw the ropes. UT throws Maven's head into the barricade. UT hits Maven's head right with the steel chair. Scotty 2 Hotty (12) dances down the run way and Undertaker levels him after throwing Maven back into the ring. UT returns to the ring and toss Maven over the top rope. UT continues to beat the holy hell out of Maven in the crowd with Maven getting a few shots in here and there. They end up in the food concession area as Christian (13) makes his way to the ring. Undertaker throws Maven's head threw the popcorn machine. Undertaker decieds "I'm hungry" and eats some popcorn. Christian sits in the turnbuckle ALA Eddy Guerrero waiting for Scotty to get in the ring. Scotty arrives and the two trade punches. Christian hits his falling reverse DDT, and gets punches to the head. Christian stomps on Scotty's face. DDP (14) makes his way to the ring. DDP punches Christian then hits a spinning clothesline. Christian takes down DDP. Christian chokes DDP with the ropes. DDP hits the Diamond Cutter on Christian. Scotty superkicks DDP. Scotty then hits the most overrated move in all of professional wrestling The Worm. DDP then tosses Scotty over the top rope. Chuck (15), who beat Booker T for the WCW title once even if its not in the record books, runs down. DDP beats the hell out of Chuck and hits a neckbreaker. Chuck stomps on DDP in the corner. He uses his boot to choke DDP. DDP punches on Chuck in the corner. Christian clotheslines DDP. Christian and Chuck double team DDP and attempt to eliminate him. Both continue to stomp on DDP. The Godfather (16) comes out with about a million ladies, I don't care what anyone one else says, He should come back as Papa Shango damn it. Meanwhile we miss the elimination of DDP because of this entire shit. He does the normal Godfather dancing stick. Chuck turns on Christian and attempts to eliminate him. Godfather gets in the ring as Albert (17) comes out. Albert does the AHGGGG! Thump move on Christian. Then jumps Chuck. Albert hits the Bicycle kick on Godfather. Albert gets tossed over the top. Chuck and Christian attack the Godfather. Godfather misses the Hoe train on both Christian and Chuck. They eliminate the Godfather. Saturn comes out (18). Saturn hits a neckbreaker on Chuck. Chuck clotheslines Saturn. Saturn and Chuck brawl. Chuck chokes Saturn with his boot in the corner. Saturn and Christian attempt to get rid of Chuck. Saturn hits a Brainbuster on Chuck. Saturn tries to get rid of Christian. Steve Austin (19) walks to the ring. Austin cleans house on everyone. Stomps for Chuck. Austin chucks Christian out the ring. Stunner on Saturn. Austin throws Chuck out, then Saturn. Austin tosses Christian back in the ring hits a Stunner and tosses him back out. He does the same for Chuck. Val Venis (20) returns now and dances then strips, you know the deal. Austin stomps a mud hole in Venis. Val punches Austin. Val hits a kneedrop, and punches Austin's head. Val punches then chops Austin. Austin Thesz press on Val. Test (21) runs to the ring. Test attacks Austin and hits the Kevin Nash elbows in the corner then chokes Austin with his big boot. Val and Test double team Austin. Val and Test hit a double back elbow. Austin brawls back. Austin clotheslines Val over the ropes. Austin then tosses Test over the top. Triple H (22) returns. Triple H and Austin have a staring contest in the ring. Triple H's intro killed 2 minutes so the next guy comes out. Oh wait, Triple H and Austin did brawl a bit. Hurricane (23) flew to the ring and attempts a double chokeslam on Austin and Triple H. Austin and Triple H both tosses Hurricane out and continue to brawl. Austin hits some chops, then HHH does. HHH clotheslines Austin. Austin hits a spinebuster on the game. Ron Simons (24) of the APA makes his way out. Ron gets a Stunner and is tossed out the ring. Triple H stomps on Austin the corner a bit. HHH tries to toss Austin over but that won't work. Austin punches the Game a bit more and attempts to toss him over. Mr. Perfect (25) comes out w/ towel and everything. Perfect starts taking out Austin and HHH. Hennig chops Austin a bit and tries to toss him over. Perfect hits a back elbow on HHH. HHH and Austin then attempt to get rid of Perfect but in the middle of it Perfect spits out his gum and slaps it mid air. That was great. Angle (26) makes his way out and charges the ring. Hennig and Austin brawl while Triple H and Angle do. Triple H and Hennig chop both Austin and Angle. Hennig attempts to eliminate Austin. Angle hits a suplex on Triple H. Angle stomps on Triple H. Angle tries tossing The Game over the ropes. Austin saves Triple H. Angle hits a belly to belly on Angle. Big Show (27) waddles down to the ring. Show headbutts Angle and Chokeslams Hennig. Triple H and Austin double team Show. Show clotheslines them both. Angle goes for a German suplex but Show shrugs him off. Triple H receives a big boot from Show. Show clotheslines Austin. Headbutt by Show on Angle. Chokeslam on Triple H by Show. Kane (28) makes his way to the ring. Kane and Show trade punches. Show big boots Kane. Both men go for their chokeslams. Kane kicks show in the nuts. Kane body slams show over the top rope. Austin hits a stunner on Kane then Angle tosses Kane over the top rope. Rob Van Dam (29) runs down to the ring. RVD runs to the ring and connects with a ***** frog splash on Angle. RVD takes out Hennig with some sort of kick. RVD nails Rolling Thunder on Austin. Triple H hits the Pedigree on RVD. Hennig and Angle trade punches while Austin chops Triple H in the corner. Booker T (30) becomes the last participant in the Royal Rumble. Booker T tosses RVD out the ring and does the Spinaroonie, after that Booker gets Stunnered and is eliminated.
Mr. Perfect Vs Austin Vs Angle Vs Triple H
Angle hits repeat German suplexes on Austin. Austin counters with a low blow. Austin attempts to eliminate Hennig. Austin becomes double teamed by Mr. Perfect and Angle. They continue to stomp on Austin. Austin fights back. Austin tries to get rid of Perfect but Angle from behind shoves Austin over the top. Hennig and Angle brawl. Austin pulls Perfect out the ring and punches on him. All return to the ring. Hennig and Angle double team HHH. Austin returns to the ring and hits everyone with a steel chair. Then leaves the arena. Hennig is almost eliminated by Angle. Perfect punches Angle like crazy and then hits the Perfectplex on Angle. HHH gets up and knocks Perfect over the top rope. Angle and Triple H stare each other down. Triple H hits a GORE on Angle and punches then stomps on Angle. Triple H goes for a clothesline only to be countered with a belly to belly. Angle goes for the elimination but silly Angle forgets that he's never going to be in that main event at Wrestlemania and its only a dream. Triple H hits the knee facebuster and then hits a clothesline over the top to win it. Overall, I liked the ending to the rumble. I wish RVD and some of the younger guys got more time but it was pretty fun. ***
Final Note: Pretty disappointing PPV actually. I was hyped for all week for it. It's not a horrible show but nothing really stands out. As I stated during the Jericho/Rock match I was in attendance for his Ladder match last year with Benoit and that's something that I'll remember, same with Honkey Tonk Man and Haku returning. Not like this is a horrible PPV its just average at its best. Nothing sucked but nothing was needed to be remembered.